Toddler Facts:

Here are some facts you may or may not know about owning a toddler:

 

Fact 1: You don’t own a toddler. One day you bring a cute cuddly baby home and the next is has suddenly been replaced by this two legged little human being that doesn’t stop moving and following you around the house saying “more juice mommy!”

 

Fact 2: Just because your toddler hated celery two days ago, does not mean he hates it now, therefore you must share….. Even though you will never know if you should have prepared more or less of any given food until after it is ready.

 

Fact 3: When leaving a room, never tell your toddler “bye bye” For hysterics will ensue because they think you are abandoning them. (Even if you are just going to the bathroom to pee)

 

Fact 4: Never assume that something is safe just because it is up high on a counter, toddlers are mini ninjas who learn the climbing skill rather quickly…

 

Fact 5: When needing something to disappear from a toddlers sight without a huge meltdown, make it disappear with magic, for it will always be exciting and they totally forget why they even wanted the item… (Side affect: hours of searching in wonder and asking in amazement “Where did it go” may occur.)

 

Fact 6: Your toddler may have the exact same food on his plate as yours, but yours will always be better.

 

Fact 7: If it is a living thing and it moves, it is exciting and must be picked up, this means anything from cats to spiders…. (Note: This may cause you minor heart attacks..)

 

Fact 8: Cleaning up your house with a toddler on the loose means cleaning 80% of everything up twice, likely five minutes after putting it away to begin with.

 

Fact 9: Key words like Jello and banana are learned very quickly, so if you bring it up in conversation with someone and your toddler is near, they will expect to be given their treat… whether you have it or not.

 

Fact 10: If your toddler says anything about his diaper or points to it at all, do not just chalk it up to toddler talk, because moments later he might just hand you his very wet diaper no longer on his bottom..

 

Fact 11: Bath time works as a great laxative for toddlers…

 

Fact 12: If you tell your toddler he can’t do something, he will likely become obsessed with it.

 

Fact 13: God made toddlers adorable for a reason, the main reason is probably because they will make you want to pull your hair out on a daily basis, something about wanting to touch EVERYTHING they shouldn’t in a 1 hour time period.

 

Fact 14: Toddlers will randomly become the most cuddly, cutest little human being ever, it is scary but treasure these moments, they wont always last long.

 

Fact 15: Silence is the scariest thing in a household with a toddler.

 

Fact 16: There will never and I mean NEVER be a dull moment.

 

(My hubby helped me come up with these based on moments with our wild, crazy lovable little boy)